spiteface.net

Tomorrow’s snowstorm
must not, can not, better not
ice up my driveway.

There are a few recipes that CANNOT BE ALTERED. Congris is one of them.

I feel like such a failure.
I’m out of regular old Uncle Ben long grain rice, and am using sushi rice.
I’m all out of the red can of black beans, so I’m using some random Frijoles Negros that I laughed at scornfully weeks ago when my dad bought them. “Ew, not the red can? You lose.”
I don’t have any slab bacon, so I’m using some Low Sodium Applewood breakfast bacon.

I hope this is at least tasty. This feels sacriligious.

PS – I decided that we’re gonna take in Scooter Libby. He is my Meepydaddy, after all. I just don’t know how we’re gonna do it, with the whole ‘move across the street’ thing.

I have the potential to adopt a cat. Not just any cat, but Scooter
Libby, the cat who fathered Meepy. His family doesn't love him like
they can, and openly admit it.

I have four cats. That's a lot of cats.
But he's a sweet kitty, and is outside in the cold a lot.
Hobbie won't like him.
Hobbie doesn't like anyone.
Diesel and Meeps won't care.
George may try to frolic with him.
I could love him better.
That's a lot of cats.
He's a good cuddler.

What do I do?

For the first time in a year, I’ve picked up a guitar. I’m still twiddling around, trying to remember how to play even the most basic of songs. I managed to give a good thwack at Killer Cars. It was my first favorite Radiohead songs, and I used to be able to play it decently enough. Some of the little noodles are coming back to me, but my fingers are a little sore, so I’m giving it a break until tomorrow.

I’ve never written a song. I’d like to write a song. I need to get other people’s music out of my head, first. That’s the tough part.

In response to this nasty Bollypost where he demonstrates his feelings of entitlement to a quasi-alienated fanbase:

Billy says, “HAY YOU GUISE, I’m totally in a new band now, but we’re the same band, but don’t expect us to play our old songs, ’cause living in the past is so passe.” Despite his bellyaching about the past being the past and the future being ripe with the vines of truthiness and love (or some equivalent poetic nonsense) he goes on stage wearing THIS:

A white Zero shirt? Who thought this was a good idea? Who dresses Billy? Did his mother dress him? Is that the problem here? He’s been dressing poorly for the last ten years. Maybe it’s a coincidence?

I like the new takes on new songs. I can enjoy Zetigeist songs at face value, and I almost like G.L.O.W, regardless of the stupid punctuation. If you close your eyes, Bodies sounds perfectly Bodies-ish. Granted, “love is suicide” feels so much more relevant when you don’t have a prom date, but it’s still a nice sentiment twelve years later.

It’s all the other extraneous crap that I can’t stand. I’m pretty sure Billy’s always been obnoxious and vitriolic, but in this era of accessibility and perpetual blogging, now I know about it. Now, I don’t like it.

I’m going to shut up and not think about the band behind the music, and just think of the pretty riffs and singalongable lyrics. Then I can be a Smashing Pumpkins fan again and happily bop my head to I of the Mourning. It’s a really good song.

Three years (and two days!) ago, I spent a frosty Sunday afternoon photogeeking with some guy I found on MySpace from elementary school.

He’s stuck around for three of the craziest years a chick can go through, and he deserves a medal.

My coworkers shared their Amazon Wish Lists to facilitate the HR-Appropriate Non- Denominational Festive Exchange of Gifts.
I create an Amazon Wish List.
I add an iTrip to my Amazon Wish List.
John looks at my Amazon Wish List.
John purchases a MYSTERIOUS ITEM.
From Amazon.

John receives a MYSTERY PARCEL.
John cackles, grabs the iPod and MYSTERY PARCEL, and runs into his bedroom.
John cackles, runs into the kitchen, grabs my iPhone, and runs into his bedroom.
John is SHOCKED and APPALLED that I have guessed he bought me an iTrip.

Who cares – I got an iTrip. <3

I present to you: An excerpt of a blog post from the first day of each month of 2008.

January:
I hope this is what 2008 is about. I’m frolicking in the kitchen making an Omlette of Doom and some lemon squares. The menfolk have hooked up the PS2 and John has taken my place in watching John-Paul play stealth mission.

February:
Rock Band is the best invention ever. I wanna play the drums for real when I grow up.

March:
I did have a good Leap Day. I got to ask several of my male friends to marry me, because as per Scottish law many moons ago, any guy who declines a proposal on Leap Day must present the deflected lover with a kiss, a pound, and a pair of gloves. I am owed three pairs of gloves. As for John-Paul and I, we did not elope, despite my request. He did not give me any gloves or a silk dress, which is also acceptable, says teh wikipedia.

April:
I am going to wind gap and buying an iphone. This is not an April fools joke.

May:
Teaching my father to play Mario Kart with the Whiil or whatever its called is quite a laugh. His favorite character is Waluigi cause he looks real cool.

June:
My First Saturday off since January was pretty awesome.
I went out for breakfast with John and my dad.. Country fried steak and eggs! We split up, with them going to a gun show and me going to the craft store.. I got a few more earring posts and fixins for a really cool necklace. I also stopped at Fashion Bug to kill a gift card, ending up with a pair of cute summery pajamas and a real snazzy shirt.

July:
My dad wants me to get anything that’s -not- a wagon, because my car should represent my “age and youthfulness” and be something that people look at and go “hey, that’s a nice car.” He’s leaning towards the Focus ’cause it’s a nice “girl car” and I need something “sporty and fun.” The more he says that type of thing, the more I want to buy a hearse. I want something that I can look at and go, “that’s my baby <3" - Eff what everyone else thinks. If they love me, they'll love my car. I looked at my old wagon with lust in my eyes every day - It was a damn sexy car, even if it was a boring ole grocery getter.

August:
I got the Web Editor interview! It’s tomorrow at 5. Its a phone intererview, ’cause its with a bunch of managers who are spread out between Bellevue and Tampa.

September:
It’s the last night of Summer Vacation. I start my new job tomorrow, so I have to go to bed really early. It’s such a sweet feeling to get everything all ready for a new start. I busted out my Popples lunchbox and packed myself a nutritious lunch: An itty-bitty salami sammich, a PB+J, a Handi-Snack, some carrot sticks and guacamole, and a bite-sized candybar. My Popples thermos holds EXACTLY four shots of espresso.
I ran through the first day of school checklist – Backpack packed? Clothes laid out? Clean socks? Know where you’re supposed to go when you get there? I wish my mom were around so I could sit on the edge of the bed and list off the things that I’ve done to prepare so she doesn’t ask me three times if I know what I’m wearing. At least I know she’d be proud of me, ’cause hell – I’m proud of me. I feel like I’ve made a lot of positive changes in myself lately.. Finally.

October:
For the first time in a thousand years, we are selling shit on Ebay again. We picked up a box of awesome yesterday for $30 including. An apparently leet PS1 with some funky audio out ports, a one-handed RPG controller, and a bunch of Playstation games, including FF7, which I’ve been DYING TO PLAY AGAIN AND BE ABLE TO CHANGE FREAKIN’ DISCS but am too cheap to pay the $50 it’s worth on the internets now. So now we’re selling the games that are worth some bling, but that we don’t really care for. w00t.

November:
Election commentary:
1. YAY =D
2. Even Carbon County voted for Obama — A place where people ACTUALLY use the word “colored” in mixed company, without irony, without getting knifed.
3. My dad and I waited in line to vote for maybe ten minutes.
4. John didn’t have to wait, except that the old biddies couldn’t find his name in the register. He had to point it out.
5. My lisence was expired, but nobody noticed. Oops.
6. Despite the three McCain signs in the neighborhood (vs our 1 Obama sign), our county went blue.
7. I’m going to go eat some ice cream.
8. This is the best speech I’ve heard McCain give.

—

It’s good to acknowledge that, despite the Ultimate Suckitude of the last two weeks, this Life thing is working pretty well for me. I’m surrounded by good people, I have a nice car, a nice house, a nice job career. Just as every year brings what appear to be unsurmountable difficulties, somehow, we all make it through. Nostalgia makes things seem a lot better than they are, and I have a lot of good memories.

The tree is up. We haven’t put up any of the ornaments yet – Just the pre-lit tree, garland, and bubble lights. And the tree topper. We’re using the pointy glass topper, wrapped in the front page of a Daily Journal from 1975.